Joke of the Day

The Bishop

We were celebrating the 100th anniversary of our church, and several former pastors and the bishop were in attendance. At one point, our minister had the children gather at the altar for a talk about the importance of the day. He began by asking, "Does anyone know what the bishop does?" There was silence. Finally, one little boy answered gravely, "He's the one you can move diagonally."

Blind Date

- "How was your blind date?" a college student asked her 21 year old roommate. - "Terrible!" the roommate answered. "He showed up in his 1932 Rolls Royce." - "Wow! That's a very expensive classic car. What's so bad about that?" - "He was the original owner."

The Broken Doll

Little Emily, the minister's daughter, ran into the house, crying as though her heart would break. - "What's wrong, dear?" asked the pastor. - "My doll! Billy broke it!" she sobbed. - "How did he break it, Emily?" - "I hit him over the head with it."

Card Name

A customer called the airline's reservation office to pay for his ticket with a credit card. The reservation specialist asked him, "Would you please spell the name as it appears on the card, sir?" The customer carefully replied, "V-I-S-A."

How many times have we been 'up there without one!'

Coach Call

As a high school football coach, I'm aware that student athletes tend to focus too much on sports. Bob, a fellow coach, was talking about one such player, who called him at home one night. When his wife informed the kid that Bob wasn't home, he became frantic and said he had to speak to the coach right away. "Just calm down, and I'll have him call you as soon as he gets home," the coach's wife told him. "What's your number?" The flustered kid replied, "Three."

Cowboy's New Car

Three cowboys were hanging out in the bunkhouse. "I know that smart-alec Tex," said the first. "The boy's going to start bragging about that new German car he bought as soon as he gets back." "Nah... not Tex," said the second. "He'll always be just a good ole boy. When he walks in, I'm sure all he'll say is hello." "I know Tex better than any of you," said the third. "He's so smart, he'll figure out a way to do both. Here he comes now!" Sure enough, Tex swung open the bunkhouse door and shouted, "Audi, partners!"